Prince Harry’s upset that he and Meghan haven’t been invited to the wedding of Princess Anne’s son, Peter Phillips, and Harriet Sperling today. Friends say he’s convinced it’s because of Wills. I’m 100% sure it’s because of Wills and that he told Phillips: “If he comes – I won’t.” Phillips is smart enough to know he needs to keep in with the really important members of the royal family – like the one who’ll one day be King.

But what did Harry expect? Did he really think that after years of trashing the royals and branding them racists, he’d be welcomed back into the fold at a family wedding. He needs to accept that while King Charles might one day forgive him, Wills won’t – not ever!

A feminist problem

Hannah Waddingham was on the red carpet this week with boyfriend, Nick Beresford, in a plunging black dress that showed off her ample bosoms and was slashed to the crotch. In fact, most of the sexy dresses Hannah wears to celeb events show off acres of perfect flesh. But it reminded me of that scene a couple of years ago when she said to a photographer: “Don’t be a dick” because he’d asked her to “show leg” as she posed outside the Albert Hall in a dress that showed off most of her legs anyway. Yes, it was sexist.

But can a woman whose trademark is skintight, revealing frocks that leave very little to the imagination really have a feminist problem with some caveman photographer asking her to show a leg – which she usually does out of choice? Still, it got her lots of lovely publicity.

I’m not surprised – are you?

Is anyone surprised Beatrice and Eugenie have been leaching off the state and the Royal Family for years? A report by the National Audit Office says neither do royal duties, yet Bea has a four-bed apartment in St James Palace while Eugenie has Ivy Cottage on the Kensington Palace estate. Neither pays a penny in rent despite having rich husbands.

But then look at their parents – two of the greediest, grasping, most entitled, owt-for-nowt people on the planet. Neither Beatrice nor Eugenie were ever going to grow up believing they had to pay their way. They learned to be liggers at the feet of the masters.

The REAL Net Zero

Who are the loons at Sainsbury’s who’ve decided to ditch brown eggs in favour of white ones because the latter have a lower carbon footprint. What twaddle.

There are hundreds of ginormous fossil fuel companies around the world pumping out billions of tonnes of Co2, yet some virtue-signalling nitwit in Sainsbury’s thinks not selling brown eggs is going to save the planet? Apparently white eggs have a 12.7% lower carbon footprint than brown ones although I’d like to see the science on that – if it even exists. But what will this mean for already hard-pressed farmers? How much is it going to cost them? Are they going to have to kill chickens that lay brown eggs? The only net zero here are the IQs of the morons who come up with these stupid ideas.

A classic case…

Don’t get me wrong, I’d love a Hermes handbag but I’m not sure how I feel seeing our players heading off for the World Cup all carrying jumbo-sized ones. Ollie Watkins was carrying a bag worth £65,00 and Ivan Toney had a tote worth £35,000.

I mean what do blokes need huge hulking handbags for? My theory? It’s got nothing to do with the bag and everything to do with the size of it. It’s a case of: “Mine’s bigger than yours”. In this particular case, it’s about the handbags!

Is it any wonder we’re in this state?

We’re constantly told NHS workers are the backbone of Britain. How when tens of thousands of them are clocking off sick at a cost to the taxpayer last year of £4.6billion last year? Their sickness absence is three times higher than the private sector.

But the reason’s simple. Their employer, NHS England, offers six months off on full sick pay and another six on half-pay whereas in the private sector the maximum is four weeks. This is outrageous. No wonder people can’t get appointments or be treated for serious illnesses when those supposed to be treating them are languishing at home on obscenely generous sick pay for months – sometimes years!

The Sikh religion is, by and large, a peaceful one – but there’s no reason they should be legally allowed to carry knives, not least because it suggests that force is justifiable. I’m sorry but this country bends over way too much for certain religions.

Catholics here get gyp for wearing crucifix to work because it offends some people, yet Sikhs can walk around with knives around their necks. It’s like me saying, ‘My religion says I must carry a Glock 19 at all times’. No, no, no!